Wednesday, December 9, 2009

Real Men Fight Two Enemies At A Time

MAIN BOUT - 24/7 ONGOING UNTIL FINISH
U.S.A., HEAVYWEIGHT CHAMPION OF THE WORLD
vs
TERRORISM IN IRAQ
and
TERRORISM IN AFGHANISTAN
and
OTHER STUFF

Peewee Leagues this Winter/Spring:
SUSPECT, FORMER THIRD TRUMPET, 4TH GRADE
vs
THERAPY A LA V.A.
and
[Winner] VOCATIONAL REHAB vs POST 9/11 GI BILL
and
THE SECOND COLLEGE INVASION

"I think that the first time, our allies let us down, they just weren't able to work fast enough and deliver such a tall order, and we didn't have a SOLID plan. I must admit, we really believed that we'd be able to blitz our way in there. We were overconfident, maybe even arrogant. We never believed that our support channels could be cut off like that. This time around, we're more humble, more aware of the risks and potential pitfalls, hopefully a little wiser, and we're fumigating a strategy. We're gonna hit 'em hard, we're gonna hit 'em fast, and we're going to take care of all the little problems along the way, and we are certainly not going to make any more promises we can't keep. God willing, we're gonna win." -Suspect on the First College Invasion.

When asked to clarify whether he was talking about the Iraq/Afghanistan wars or not, Suspect looked confused and remarked that he wasn't aware "that people watch that game anymore."

When asked to clarify who "we" were, Suspect said, "Me and my big mouth."

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

I am beginning to think of you as the Unusual Suspect... I like your definition of we! Mark Twain said the only people with the right to use the royal "we" were kings, editors, and people with tapeworms. z

13 Stoploss said...

voc rehab vs. ch. 33

1. 48 months tuition > 36 months tuition - school months, not year months

2. 100% coverage of books < $1000 a year for books - with VRE, you go to the bookstore, get what you need, and VA takes care of it. With ch. 33, whatever is leftover is yours to spend. I don't spend $1000 a year on books.

3. VRE living stipend <<<<< ch. 33 BAH - With two dependents, my wife got $700'ish from VRE. Under ch. 33, BAH in my zip is $2152 per month. That settled it for me.

Kelsey said...

So you're going to attempt the college thing again? I really hope everything works out this time, no one deserves it more than you! Good luck!

13 Stoploss said...

$547.54 is the "no dependents" subsistence allowance under Ch. 31: http://www.vba.va.gov/bln/vre/doc/sa_rates.pdf

Compare that to $895, 945, 1001, or 1043 for the 4 regions in your home state for ch. 33 (E5 w/dependent is the standard rate): http://www.army.com/articles/BAH/montana.html

Liz said...

Reading this made my whole day better. Thanks.

I say, listen to Jason and take what the army owes you.

bigD said...

Work it out guys...work it out!!
It pays to know how to work the system. Big bureaucracies hope that you'll just give up, but, homey don't play that! Walk softly and carry a big stick! You guys rock.
:P

Anonymous said...

Laughing Out Loud!!

you d'man :)

bigD is absolutely right - its all engineered to make you give up.

and hey, your big mouth just may be your best feature

moving on to my chores now with a smile on my face - thanks man!

~P~